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Week 8 Report: My Cousin Vinny's Reign
With Halloween and the Haunting of Jakobi Myers in our past, it's time to look forward towards the playoff race and Thanksgiving slate. First, shoutout to Tom and Mike for continuing to carry this league in the trade department - giving me something to do with my short attention span during TNF commericals.
Vinny took down Conlan in our Matchup of the Week in week 8, while PPP won in what will rival Zach vs. Conlan for sweat of the year. It seems nearly certain what teams will make the playoffs, but Mike will continue to make the push and try to fuck up some draft plans. The season is halfway finished, so it's time to shit or get off the toilet for those in the bye race.
The league POWER RANKINGS have been updated. We received votes from 9 teams in the league. The results are:
Our Matchup of the Week is Vinny vs. Zach. Vinny was recently robbed of a Pickens Titty Touch as I finished this up. REMINDER: Ledger has been updated with all recent trade dues. Zach owes $200 more, Vinny owes $100, and Nick owes $200. Jakobi can't hurt you anymore, and 🍀BOL🍀 to all Colosseum competitors in week 9.
Killian vs. Walt | Walt wins 125.8 to 111.5
Summary: My team balled a little bit too hard for MPF, but Walt was able to sneak out unscathed similar to his team name inspiration. He's a tit hair away from a bye.
Conlan vs. Vinny | Vinny wins 136 to 114.8
Summary: Vinny took out another contender in week 8, moving on to a dominant 7-1. He's a healthy Achane away from a ridiculous lineup once again, while Conlan inches toward the hot seat at 4-4.
Nick vs. Chris | Nick wins 143.5 to 144.8
Summary: Nick suffered another OOF defeat via the Jakobi 1 catch fiasco that narrowly handed him another high-scoring defeat. To his credit, the man is looking like he'll weather the storm and has a winning lineup when healthy. Chris gets a massive dub to move to 5-3 and an outside chance at a bye.
Mike vs. Zach | Mike wins 141.9 to 76.1
Summary: Fantasy football is a funny little lady. After wiping the entire league for weeks, Zach suffered a blowout loss to Mr. Gimmedome for his first loss in nearly 2 months (week 1 L). Mike will do his best to try to boot one of Nick, Conlan or Chris out of the playoffs to blow up his 1st round pick. Zach will look to take down a giant in Vinny's squad next week.
Tom vs. Tim | Tim wins 82.5 to 66.7
Summary: Another tanking masterpiece between Tim and Tom in week 8. The tank Goblin (Tim) beat the tank God (Tom) in this matchup, though they were both the lowest MPF teams of the week (bastards).
Tom trades: Mark Andrews, 2024 1st Round Pick (Via Vinny), 2024 2nd Round Pick, 2024 2nd Round Pick (Via Conlan)
Mike trades: Jordan Addison, Dallas Goedert
Summary: If you're reading this, take a deep breath Mike. Jordan Addison might go on to be a superstar, but you may just get 3 picks between 10 & 17 plus Mark Andrews in return. A championship or sniping of the next Puka will remedy this quickly. This trade helps Tom shed some picks and pick up a YOUNG STAR, while Mike gets to make some relevant picks in '24.
